This issue of “Le Entrepreneurian”, we speak with Stirling Gardner and “Sea” Brian Smith, the creators of the financial juggernaut, “Jelly o’ the Month Club” in their rustic Cape Cod getaway…
LE: Congratulations on the rampant success of your monthly jellies.
Stirling: Thank you, Barry. We’re very pleased to be sharing our sweet, fruity joy with our subscribers
LE: How did the two of you get started?
“Sea” Brian Smith: While summering in Bangkok, jet-skiing and fucking 9 year olds, we were despondent over having yet another breakfast with ONLY grape jelly for our scones.
Stirling: We thought, “Wouldn’t it be fun if someone mailed us something raspberry or currant or mango-like?”
LE: What was your biggest challenge?
Stirling: Thrust-snapped 9-year old pelvises…oh…. for the company you mean.
Both: (Laugh hysterically)
Stirling: I guess it’d be the Byzantine LLC formation paperwork we had to deal with. Mountains of it.
“Sea” Brian Smith: Just excruciating for starting a food preparation company that ships globally. Health codes, etc. A real barrier to business.
LE: What keeps you busy when you’re not making jellies?
Stirling: Well, Brian here is really into Faulkner and has just finished translating, “The Sound and The Fury”, into Bengali which I think is going to really bring the whole decline of the South to those people in a way they haven’t had the privilege to experience yet. Me? I just finished a case and a half of Dayquil and I’m getting ready to work on my painting of “The Battle of Algiers” for a few days until the buzz wears off. I just ADORE working with pastels.
LE: Any advice for fellow entrepreneurs?
“Sea” Brian Smith: Stay the fuck out of the jelly business.
Stirling: Far away, bitches. We will rape your world.
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